Перевод песни Key to the gate (Burzum)
Key to the gate
Ключ к вратам
My eyes are shut I cannot see
Though clear is thy despair
I drift away — far away
From places of which you seek
Though I seek thy hell
You close the gate before me
Your life is right, and I’m to
Follow to your paradise
I cannot fall in love
Love is for them
Lusting for the sky —
Heaven
Why did I come to this world
Of sorrow why is this true
Where is my dagger of sacrifice
I will open the gates to Hell one day.
Глаза мои закрыты, не вижу ничего,
Но ясно ощущаю отчаяние твоё.
Я устремляюсь вдаль, отсюда далеко –
К местам, которых ты жаждал так давно.
Стремлюсь к твоему аду,
Но ты закрыл врата.
И ты живешь как надо –
Я в рай иду тогда.
Я не могу влюбиться,
Любовь оставь другим.
Мне есть к чему стремиться –
Я небом одержим.
Зачем пришёл я в мир,
Где я страдания найду.
Возьму я свой кинжал –
Ворота ада отворю.
Источник
Лун to the gate
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NOTE: Please view this guide page inside your web browser (right-click on page and «Copy URL», paste to your browser) as for some reason when viewed inside the Steam App, many of the game screenshots aren’t displayed at all.
- The game’s «end goal» is basically getting to the Retirement Home in Florida, which requires you to collect 50 JDA tickets by roaming through the map, completing puzzles et to purchase a Retirement Home in Florida from the Blue Vending Machine at uptown City Center.
Although you can speed-run to the mentioned «end goal» by gathering 50 tickets and purchasing the Florida Retirement Home before using the tickets to buy anything else, that will necessarily mean that you will miss out on a lot of the puzzles, events, hidden secrets and bucket list items, and most crucially, a lot of the fun content of the game.
The Bucket List that can be activated by pressing «B» in-game (by default). The bucket list is a list of in-game objectives, and completing each will unlock either more JDA tickets or new items such as guns, wearables, tools, fun stuff, etc.
The JDA tickets are required for making purchases from the Blue Vending Machine (only one in the game) that sells in-game items such as weapons, clothing (i.e. for increased speed, flying, etc.), tools and additional fun/gag items such as musical instruments, that are unlocked upon game progress. See below for the location.
- The game starts inside the Discount Retirement Home in downtown City Center. The staff has locked you inside of your upstairs apartment and you need to get out. Since this part works also as an in-game tutorial to the game’s workings (controls, basics of the physics engine, etc.), it will not be covered further in here.
- After you’re out on the street, get to know the Red Vending Machine (for guns, rockets, bombs and other weapons), the Yellow Vending Machine (for clothing, apparel, wearable and usable items such as rocket packs, etc) — these two types are found across the entire game’s area and the closest ones to the initial starting point are situated downstairs in the retirement home and outside directly on the wall that’s directly opposite its main entrance.
There’s only one Blue Vending Machine on the entire map. It is located up the stairs to the park at the center of a small city square, next to the graveyard and the park. You use the blue vending machine to purchase items once, after which you can then spawn them from the yellow and red machines without limitations. The unlocked items also apply to multiplayer co-op games, meaning that accomplishments done in one game sandbox can be used in another.
The Blue Vending Machine, in uptown City Center
- You can mug NPC passers-by who are carrying a yellow shopping bag and grab their contents, they often contain either a playable instrument or some sort of item that is usable as a melee weapon. Note that sometimes the NPC bags contain nothing. Mugging NPC bypassers with blue glasses on will yield the speed glasses that will make you move faster upon wearing them.
Lightsabers (one red, one blue), at the back of the «Tröja» clothing shop in the City Center, next to the clothes-fitting booths.
Numerous various objects (including, but not limited to fishes, lightsabers, crowns) can be fished up at the docks with a fishing rod (get one from the Shotgun Shogun Wildlife Shop or from an NPC at the docks) and by aiming at the schools of small fish that spawn in the water.
Lightning Wand (to derail the cable cart / tram and to complete the dark ritual at the Zen Garden) can be found from an inflatable swimming pool, inside a gated backyard that is right next to the busy freeway.
- (a.k.a. «What are friends for, except to shoot off the correct limbs off your body?»)
Some of the puzzles and locked doors that require self-mutilation, and especially those that require very specific self-mutilation (specific parts of the limbs and/or the head) are hands down (no pun intended) the easiest to go thru in multiplayer co-op mode. Not to mention that often one player’s unlocking of a puzzle unlocks the features from it for other players in the sandbox as well. This gives playing in multiplayer a huge benefit over grinding through the game’s objectives in solo mode alone, where things can become grindy, to put it mildly (and definitely with pun intended).
Flying in the game is more or less required to unlock some of the areas and puzzles within the game, hence it’s recommended that you get yourself airborne as early as possible and learn how to maneuver in-flight.
The are many different methods of flying in the game, but the Butt Propeller is by far the easiest flying contraption to use and to obtain. Unlike i.e. the rocket backpack, it doesn’t blow up if you accidentally push the «throttle» for a bit too long.
Although it doesn’t take you as high as a rocket pack, combined with the Fast Glasses and the Hover Boots makes it by far the most practical roof-hopping method. Both Fast Glasses and Hover Boots are unlockable with JDA tickets from the Blue Vending Machine and can also found on the map — the Fast Glasses can even be mugged off from a random NPC bypasser if necessary.
(Fast Glasses + Butt Propeller + Hover Boots. Remember to equip one boot per each foot!)
Combined together with the balloon cart (see unlocking the «BALLOONER» item on the Bucket List), this gear combination makes you able to reach the highest places on the map (including the blimp) with relative ease and high maneuverability.
With the hover boots on, you can anti-ragdoll yourself from the flying posture and gain some extra boost by tapping the space bar. Having two hover boots equipped gives you more boost than having only one boot on. Same thing goes for all the other footwear and the benefits they bring.
Completing the «TOP OF THE WORLD» Bucket List item will unlock the butt propeller from the yellow vending machines, but you can also find it on the game map from the other side of the busy freeway.
(TIP: when crossing, use the middle white lines as your safe spots to wait for an opportunity.)
Opening the gold-plated locked chest requires a golden key (i.e. from the balcony that is near to the busy freeway; see the Golden Keys section of this guide.)
Once you’ve got a golden key, hop across the busy highway in one piece (or, at least with the key still in your hand) to underneath the «BOOMER-B-GONE» sign on the other side. Open up the chest with the golden key and there’s your butt propeller!
- The golden keys found across the map are used to open either locked chests (wooden chests that have a golden lock in them) or golden gates (quite literally).
One key fits (almost) all golden locks, but you will also lose the key in the opening process.
There are three other keys in the game that are not the basic golden key-type and are used for different puzzles.
Some of the Golden Key locations are listed below.
- On the reception table of the Snail Hotel as you walk in the front door. The Snail Hotel is located opposite to the «Shotgun Shogun» store, on the street where the cable cart goes back and forth.
- On the back patio of the Snail Hotel. Go outside from the hotel’s back entrance on to a patio. Walk behind the corner on the back patio and there should be another golden key at the end of it.
- Graveyard, uptown City Center. Find a shovel from the ground and start digging.
- Men’s public bathroom, ground level, in the courtyard of the city block that’s inside the car-riddled ring road loop.
NOTE: This key is guarded by an angry naked Yakuza guy, who will likely beat you up.
- On a balcony of one of the buildings that are facing the busy freeway. Second level. use i.e. the sewer lid down below to catapult yourself over there. There’s also a crate next to the key that breaks down if you drag it over the balcony and throw it down to the street, revealing one ticket.
- On top of empty crab crates at the docks, behind the corner from The Cove’s seaside entrance.
- Rooftop of the angry drunkard’s house, inner yard of the Zen Garden. No flying contraption is needed to access it, just climb up the ladders that are on the side of the building all the way to the satellite dish-filled roof.
NOTE: Some of the bucket list challenges are so self-explanatory that they shouldn’t need any advice. If you can’t get them done without resorting to a guide like this, then perhaps the problem is between the monitor and the controller. «:D»
Location: Global [In this example: City Center]
(Jump through a ring with a bike)
Get to the roof next to the basketball court, there should be a red trick bike in there. Ride the bike to the back corner of the roof to get enough speed and then just pedal forward to the ramp, jump through the hoop and profit! (There’s also one JDA ticket inside the hoop, don’t forget to catch it.)
There’s at least two beehive spots on the map, both in the City Center, one is inside the «traffic loop» where blue cars drive around, the other one is in the park with the graveyard, stairs up from the retirement home starter point.
All you need to do is to get close enough to the hive and maybe slap it a little to irritate the bees, they should attack you with little provocation needed.
If you don’t have the bear trap unlocked from the vending machines, then the easiest option is to go to the «Shotgun Shogun — Hunting & Wildlife» shop that is up the tram tracks on the left from the city’s main square/promenade.
You will need a golden key to unlock its door first, though. (The closest golden key by default is on the reception table of the Snail hotel, that is on the opposite side of the street from the Shotgun Shogun.)
There are seven bear traps in the store, step on all of them and try to make them clamp on to your body. Bear traps can be reused by picking them up and throwing them down again, you can also step on them even when they’re face down and they should still snap on to a player.
After you get the seven bear traps stick on to you, the remaining three traps can be found from the Zen Garden’s inner yard where the «Get off my lawn!»-drunkard lives, his lawn is filled with bear traps.
(Get various hazards stuck on you)
Location: Global
[This example: City Center] One method to get this completed is to get to the inner yard in the City Center, very near to the busy freeway and the starter retirement home, where two kids are throwing water balloons at one another and there’s a chicken coup in between.
Jump in the bushes (/hedgerow) to be impaled by all kinds of twigs, sticks and branches and to be thrown with water balloons.
You can also expand this list by running through shop windows and get all kinds of other things stuck to you that either bite you or cause other type of harm.
Location: City Center, basketball court
This one’s a bit tricky and 2-player co-op is the easiest way to achieve this, although this can be done solo too.
2(+)PLAYERS: Very easy to do. Have a friend to cut you into a stump and then fly you into the hoop + drop you down in there, which is likely the easiest and quickest way.
To make this easier when playing solo, you can fill up the basketball courtyard with trampolines first — this is not a necessary step, but it makes this much easier. The trampoline’s initial spawn location is i.e. the trampoline sales point opposite to the Zen Garden’s main entrance.
TIP: Use trampolines as your aid to minimize respawn retries. Trampolines can be stolen from the guy who sells them on the other side of the street to the Zen Garden’s main entrance. Be advised that the trampoline-seller will however might over time come to get his trampolines back (all trampolines stolen from him are only kept «safe» when they’re inside the Zen Garden.)
Get a butt propeller and an explosive that you can hold in one of your hands. My personal favorite for this is the C4 & the butt propeller. Fly to the rooftop above the basketball court that’s right above the basket hoop. Blow yourself up with the C4 as you’re either lying down slumped on the ground (ragdolled) near to the C4 or standing near it a few steps away from the explosion itself, this way you should become a stump. If you died, you were too close to the explosion. Then, carefully roll over the ledge and drop down into the hoop below.
Location: City Center
There’s a karaoke bar next to the main road where the tram goes back and forth, inside of it is the bar owner who is crying about his business being bad.
Grab the flute from a table inside the karaoke bar and go into the bathroom section and enter i.e. the men’s bathroom. You might need to grab the bar of soap from the table inside the bathroom and use it as well. Once you find a spot to slip in the bathroom, it should tear your clothes away, unlocking the «Birthday Suit» challenge.
After you’re stripped naked without clothes, go to the stage and start playing the flute naked. That should unlock the «Karaoke Master».
Location: Sport Centre
You will need a Golden Key to unlock the gate of the baseball cage. Go to the baseball batting cage, open up the golden gate with a golden key (see «Golden Key Locations» from another part of this guide).
Whack the NPC holding the baseball bat to the ground and take the baseball bat from him. Turn the ball shooting machine on with the red button, swing until you hit a ball.
Location: Sport Centre
Shoot, swing or otherwise move the football into either one of the goals on the field. Unlocks spawning the football from the yellow vending machine.
Location: Zen Garden
Electrocute 5 NPC’s at one time. Get the either the lightning hammer (toy stores and various other places) or the electric glove («Taser»), equip it and go inside the Zen Garden.
It might be easier to do this at the Zen Garden while wearing the Zen Master hat, so that the NPC’s don’t attack you.
Go next to the giant gong that’s in the courtyard, hold down fire button for the glove for it to charge up, then slam the gong with the glove, it should knock out every one of the female monks as long as they are in the somewhat near vicinity.
Location: City Center
Get into the basket of the yellow blimp that is circling the skies over the City Center area.
Easiest methods to achieve this are either to use the rocket pack, or a combination of the butt propeller and a balloon cart for the propulsion and lift (lattermentioned is usually easier).
Location: Kouen Park
Bounce on three sheep within two seconds inside the park. Easiest way to accomplish this is to just find a round-fenced sheep pen from the park that has four or more sheep in it — the more the easier.
Try to approach the first one with all limbs still intact so that it’ll headbutt you horizontally into other sheep, instead of bouncing off the sheep’s back vertically, which inevitably makes you lose time. Some suggest taking the «never ragdoll» pill first if you have one available, but it’s not required to pass this challenge.
Location: Global/Toys
Attach balloons to objects. These can be other players or NPC’s shot with a Balloon Gun. You can get a Balloon Gun from i.e.:
- The toy store in the City Center (in the building block that is inside the traffic loop)
The kids department of some of the gun & explosive stores on the map
Popping enough NPC’s and players will first unlock the balloon gun (or the possibility to purchase one) and eventually the balloon cart, which is a must-have in the game.
You can use the balloon cart to both incapacitate a player and lift them up in the air until the balloon pops and the player drops down.
Location: City Center (Uptown, next to the park)
Dig up stuff from the ground. Go to the graveyard area of the park that’s located uptown, above the starter spot (outside Discount Retirement Home, up the stairs, on the right). There should be a shovel in the ground. Dig through the marked grave spots for stuff.
There’s at least one golden key hidden in one of the graves that can be used to i.e. unlock the nearby crypt.
Location: Docks
Blow up the large «Sushi & Fries» restaurant.
This takes place at the far-back waterfront portion of the docks near The Cove Bar. The mission is actually way simpler than it seems.
Although the game suggests via a character sitting on the remote dock portion that you should blow up Mama Sushi with the provided cannons, there’s absolutely no need to do so (insert comments about game design— moving along).
Simply locate the red gunpowder kegs/barrels underneath the Mama Sushi sign and let it rip with your favorite method of fiery mayhem.
This has been proven to work with at least the large bazooka from the opposing pier as well as with a heavy flamethrower on the Mama Sushi pier — the latter will likely kill the player though due to close proximity.
At the crab shop, there’s a locked crate on top of the crab crates. To access that, you need to shoot off all the arms of the crabs. Key is behind the corner or behind the crab boxes in a back room (both the key and the crates are literally at the same corner), should open up at least two large fishes to swing around with.
Note: Some of the lower fish tier stuff can be unlocked by grabbing fishes at the fish sales stands (where that grumpy man is chopping them up) and trying to eat anything that can be eaten (some of the fishes can only be swung or equipped in the head, do that too just in case. )
Go to the Voodoo Shop and look up at the inner ceiling after you enter it. There’s a very large fish hanging from a net. Grab it and then click to eat it.
The insanely large fish on top of one of the buildings at the dock. Easiest method is to fly right into it to make it topple down into the water at the docks below and then just come down, grab it and eat it.
Get yourself a fishing rod and start fishing by hitting a school of small fishes by throwing the bobber into the water on top of the school of fish, then waiting until the bobber goes down, then reeling in the catch.
This yields you some items; at least a crown, two different light swords and various other stuff (fishes etc) can be found this way. The best place for the fish packs to spawn in seem to be the corner docks of Mama Sushi.
You can get a fishing rod i.e. from the hand of a random NPC at the docks, or from one of the store shelves (i.e. the shop that sells landmines and bear traps in the city centre.)
Equip a butt propeller and some thing to fly with, i.e. a small flamethrower. Fly to the roof of «Johnny’s Black Market Fireworks», behind the neon sign of the shop. Set the absolutely cartoonishly massive firework behind the sign on fire using the flamethrower.
Location: Global (i.e.: Retirement home, City Center)
The fish tank at the retirement home (2nd story, where the game starts from.)
Go to the hallway that has the TV in the ceiling corner and an empty fish tank, then jump in the tank from the end that has the electricity-sparking AC outlet on the wall.
Location: Global (i.e.: Angry Drunk’s Home, Zen Garden)
One of the silliest challenges on the list, you accumulate this in the game over time as you climb up ladders with the left and right interaction buttons (Q and E by default on PC) and the arrow up (W by default on PC).
Perhaps the best place to grind this one through is at the ladder of the house where the angry drunkard lives (the inner main yard of the Zen Garden area). Go to the side of his house and find the ladder there, or use any other ladder of your choice in the game.
Tap Q and E in a laid-back pace in order not to swing yourself into the skies and for the climbs to register. Sometimes you can get climbs registered when you go to the top of the ladder and keep on grabbing it with Q and E intermittently.
(Derail the cable cart)
After obtaining the Lightning Wand, shoot at the cable cart at it. It will go haywire until it skids off the rails down the street.
The Lightning Wand can be found i.e. from the backyard pool mentioned in «Overall Game Tips, Misc. Object Locations».
(Deliver boxes with a fork lift)
This bucket list item is among the cruelest grind-pranks on the player.
Seriously — you should consider filling this bucket list item at a point where you’ve already finished off the majority of other challenges. Reasons being i.e. that you must have the drawbridges opened up to the Docks in order to get to and deliver one of the three required crates to complete this task, and also because you have to be more or less bonkers to have the mental fortitude to ram this one through.
In other words, expect your mind to look like the metaphorical contents of the crates you are delivering after you’re done with this one.
Although the game doesn’t explain it in more detail, once you’re equipped yourself into the forklift, the forklift mechanism can be raised and lowered with left and right mouse buttons. If you tip over or roll sideways on the ground with the fork, pressing space bar should help reset the forklift upright should you become stuck. If that doesn’t help, try raising and lowering the fork. If that doesn’t work, try high-yield explosives. He he.
You might want to wear hover boots and/or take steroids to be able to move the forklift around manually in case it gets stuck.
NOTE: Do NOT use the small/miniature forklift that you can find from the shipping container at the back of the construction yard. You can’t lift the crates high enough with it. Only use the full-size forklifts for this task.
Start off by first derailing the tram in the city center using the lightning wand. Then, get yourself a forklift from the main promenade/square in the City Center, near the park and drive it up the road.
You will need to raise the front fork a bit before you can get up the hill on the road with tram tracks on it, otherwise you’ll get stuck.
The crates you will need to deliver are marked with a multicolor stripe along their edges and a «fragile cargo»-symbol on them.
Delivery crate location: Uptown City Center, Basketball Court
Delivery slot location: Behind the corner, on the cable cart street, next to «Sushi and Fries»
This crate is at the back of the basketball courtyard and can be grabbed by either dragging it by hand or pinning it against the wall with the forklift. The delivery slot for it is right around the corner, on the left side of the «SUSHI AND FRIES» restaurant. Lift the crate into that slot.
Delivery crate & slot location: The entrance of Sports Arena
Easiest method with this crate is to toss or lift it by hand inside the Sports Arena side of the entrance over the closed gates. Then, drive the forklift as fast as possible onto the jump ramp next to the entrance and hop on the other side with it. Lift the crate into the slot and you’re done.
Delivery crate & slot location: Next to the counter in the Pink Eye Bar (crate), back area of the Docks (slot)
This is the crate that will make you regret ever trying to complete this challenge. Not only it is an absolute self-mutilating pain to get to, but also expect a lot of sunken forklifts while you’re at it, mostly due to the amount of cluttering objects that are on your way to the delivery slot, not to mention an angry NPC police officer that’s patrolling that specific spot of the docks.
The crate itself is easy to find, it’s right next to the counter inside the Pink Eye Bar at the far back end of the Docks area. To make things safe, you might want to drag the crate by hand through the restaurant to the other side where the delivery slot is.
The conveyor belt spawn-door for forklifts is on the left side in the picture (left button in the three-button row for another forklift). The NPC bouncer patrols the area on the right.
If all else fails, you can try pressing the leftmost button at the conveyor belt door that is at the back end of the docks, it will spawn a new forklift. However, this area is guarded by an even angrier NPC bouncer who will grab you out from the forklift and throw you around with every chance he gets.
Sometimes the NPC bouncer is easiest to bypass by spawning in some more junk (such as forklifts) from the conveyor belt door and trying to block his path that way. You might grab some landmines and C4 from the mine shop right next to him and make him disappear for a while.
If you still keep on failing, then you might want to solve the Car Battery Puzzle at the back of the docks that will unlock the Magnetic Ray Gun. It can be used to draw in all types of metallic objects (including other players that have anything metallic on them).
Location: (Uptown) City Center
- Find the crypt that’s at the back of the graveyard in the park, opposite to the Blue Vending Machine.
Location: (Uptown) City Center, The Crypt
- Open the crypt door with a golden key, pull away the stone lid from the crypt entrance and jump in.
Find the grave of «S. Connor» and open it up with explosives, i.e. C4.
You can find weapons and explosives by opening the caskets that are inside the crypt. Some of the coffins are in open grave slots, some of them are sealed in, making it necessary to blow them up in order to access them.
Location: (Uptown) City Center, The Crypt
- Use another Golden Key to enter the inner room of the crypt (large wooden door down the stairs from the crypt’s casket level) and be prepared to fight!
There’s a chest on the right side of the room that is filled with wooden stakes. Grab them as soon as possible and then open the coffin that’s in the middle of the room.
Exit through the pentagram portal once you’re done.
Location: City Center
Jump through a burning hoop with a bike.
First, get yourself a flamethrower. Then, go to the ring that’s right outside the Discount Retirement Home (starter point) and light up the two poles in flames that are next to the ring.
Get a red bicycle from one of the bike stands in uptown City Center (near where the bongo player is and the Docks area starts) and ride it through the burning hoop.
Location: Global
The easiest way to accomplish this is to go to a place that sells ice cream (a convenience store or a gas station) and has a chest-type freezer inside.
Jump into the freezer and eat three ice creams in a row. That should turn you into an ice block.
Location: Global
(In this example: City Center)
Hold your head in your hand and ride a hobby horse. First, get decapitated, then grab your severed head into one of your hands, a hobby horse in another and start running around the city.
Hobby horses are most easily found from toy stores, such as the one that’s in downtown City Center next to the main street loop, quite near the Discount Retirement Home.
Equipping a hobby horse will make your character run faster. Two hobby horses increases the speed even more.
- Pelvis puzzles are the ventilation duct puzzles that you will have to go through in order to progress in the game.
To fit into the ventilation ducts that take you to the puzzle rooms, you must first reduce your character’s body into a stump (= no legs, no hands, no head, no legs, no stomach and chest torso) and then roll and hop (space bar) into the air duct with your remaining health.
Once inside the puzzle rooms, you must bounce and roll through various obstacles while having extremely low health (death is usually just a hop or two away.)
One of the more nightmarish stump puzzle rooms. (Location for this room: Docks, street level, behind the corner from the praying mantises and crab cages)
- Two air vent puzzles close to one another on the cable cart street.
(The vent that’s on the right in picture above). On the street corner outside of The Cove Bar’s main entrance, opposite to the fish sales stand. The fish seller will help in cutting you into a stump.
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